Thursday, July 16, 2009

Thoughts on Puppy Bowling

There is also the highly controversial notion of using puppies as bowls. For soup and such.

But I want to get back to the idea of a puppy playing with the big boys. Transcending the hound/human mammal barrier that has caused so much hardship in this fair country. We have already seen great steps being taken in the football realm (see: Puppy Bowl V), but the puppies are only allowed to participate with other puppies. Why can't a puppy do anything that a human can? Are they that threatening because they have fur? Or are we simply afraid of competition?

I will concede that it would be quite embarrassing to suddenly see a puppy at #1 in the world rankings. After inventing the sport, to be continuously dominated by an outsider we begrudgingly let in would be a bit hard to swallow. I could definitely see some jealousy, some xenophobia, some "us vs. them", and quite possibly some sabotage. But isn't that the spirit of the game? Isn't that why we compete? To be the best and to beat the best?

It is for this reason that I say:

Let the puppies bowl.

That's right. If we are to break down the walls that separate us, this so called "fur barrier", then we need to start now. Sure, the puppies will face hardships, but they are necessarry to end the tyrany of humans who have dominated this wonderful sport for so long. Future generations will be able to look back and say "That was it. That was the moment we started being treated like equals".

Will some brave puppy please stand up?

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